Wednesday, July 12, 2006

HELLHOUND ON MY TRAIL.

It is with a heavy heart that I must inform that the honeymoon for Jasemine and me has ended.

It ended at precisely the moment that she jumped into my daughter’s swimming pool this afternoon—which, I should hasten to add, was the third time this week that she has gone for a swim.

Perhaps I could forgive the fact that this little, four month old puppy produces enough fertilizer to turn Ethiopia into Kansas. Indeed, we should all rejoice that she possesses such a healthy and vigorous digestive system.

But when a tired man—and in particular, a tired man wearing caqui-colored shorts—opens his front door after a long day of work and is immediately greeted with the smelly, muddy paws of a manic, soaking-wet mongrel...well, something has to give.

And for the past two hours, I’ve been giving my full and undivided attention to my two cats.

Clean, litter box-trained and not the least bit interested in water sports.

13 Comments:

At 10:43 PM, Blogger CanadianSwiss said...

LMHO! I've got so many things to say here, but having slept only about 4 hours last night (too hot & humid), I will go to bed and try to catch up on sleep. I'll be back!

 
At 10:56 PM, Blogger The Big Finn said...

Kansas...awesome band!

 
At 11:59 PM, Blogger woman wandering said...

Hearty laughter from Belgium ...

This proves an old theory true ... no rest for the wicked my dear, no rest at all ;)

 
At 12:52 AM, Anonymous Culinary Fool said...

You are so fickle! You thought she was so cute when you met her. And now she's just staying true to herself... did you think she would change overnight just for you? Some men expect so much... Oh wait this is a dog we're talking about, right? :-)

I'd still like to know what made you think that she would no longer jump in the pool? Seems to me you should have been expecting the exact outcome you got, silly!

 
At 5:11 AM, Blogger Angie said...

I agree, so fickle! Begrudging the poor dog her dip in the pool on a hot Spanish summer day. :)

I'm thinking of trading my cat for... nothing. Too bad you're an ocean away. My cat could use some obedience lessons from your cats. She's a feline Jasemine!

 
At 7:21 PM, Blogger CanadianSwiss said...

Ok, I'm back. Did YOU put her ears up like that?!! The poor thing. LOOK! She says: "I'm sorry, but it was soooo hot outside. Besides, no one said: "NO!" She's just a baby. HA! And that from a cat fan! ;-)

 
At 10:07 PM, Blogger Sal DeTraglia said...

C-Swiss: I'd love to take credit for the tasteful arrangement of Jazz's ears, but I can't. That's their natural state. It does look a bit silly. I don't know if they look more like Aunt Jemima's dew rag, or my Aunt Evelyn's beehive.

Ang: I don't mind if a dog wants to go for a swim in a pool. Just not the pool that I'm responsible for cleaning, skimming and vacuuming. But yesterday evening I solved the problem. How? By draining all the water out of the pool. No kidding. That'll teach her to mess with a species of superior intellect.

Beep: Beep! You're back! It's been such a long time...and yet, it also feels as if we've never lost touch. :-) As for your observation...she seemed so cute at first, but turned into a demon overnight. We...are talking about dogs, aren't we?

Lady Di: I will rest, and rest real good, next Tuesday.

TBF: But...Kansas aren't Canadian. Hey...I just discovered (two years later) that Rush released an EP called "Feedback" that's nothing but covers of great 1960's rock tunes. Why didn't you tell me?!

 
At 5:09 AM, Anonymous Culinary Fool said...

:-) I'm always lurking - just hard to get a word in edgewise, sometimes!

 
At 4:38 PM, Blogger CanadianSwiss said...

Uhhhm. I'm sure your daughter's going to be real happy to find a dry pool ;-)

 
At 4:58 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

How To Give A Cat A Bath
1. Thoroughly clean the toilet.


2. Add the required amount of shampoo to the toilet water, and have both lids lifted.


3. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.


4. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids (you may need to stand on the lid so that he cannot escape). CAUTION: Do not get any part of your body too close to the edge of the toilet, as his paws - and claws - will be reaching out for any object they can find.


5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a "powerwash and rinse" which I have found to be quite effective.


6. Have someone open the door to the outside, and ensure that there are no people between the toilet and the outside door.


7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids.


8. The now-clean cat will rocket out of the toilet, and run outside, where he will proceed to dry himself.


Sincerely,


The Family Dog

 
At 6:17 PM, Blogger The Big Finn said...

Sal -
I thought everybody kept up to date on all of Rush's releases. I'll do a better job of keeping you informed in the future.
TBF

 
At 7:55 PM, Blogger Alison said...

Awww... how could you stay made at that sweet little face... :)

 
At 2:43 PM, Blogger Lisa said...

AAAWWWW...don't be so hard on her. All I can say is the consequences of an over-heated dog are not good. Our neighbor's poor beast did the ol' stiff-as-a-board trick (in OUR yard, no less) after a jog up the road with his master on a hot, hot day. Being a puppy she probably can't regulate her temperature as well as an adult either...NOW don't you think Jaz is a smart little thing. Plus, would even one of your little furball hackers love you with all her being as much as I bet little Jasmine loves you. Also, its better than what my Pyrenees does when he's hot. He digs Great Pyrenees sized holes in the garden and lays in them...and if you know how big a Pyrenees is you'd appreciate your little pool-dipper.

 

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