Wednesday, September 27, 2006

THE RETURN OF MR. OKTOBER.

I had seen the brown UPS van driving through my neighborhood yesterday, and it struck me as odd.

DHL, TNT and Federal Express are common sights around here. But I hadn’t seen a UPS van for at least a year.

“Whatever!” I muttered to myself, and went back to my desk to resume the crucial task at hand—trying to hang hoop-earrings on a COCONUT.

Then the doorbell rang.

I ran downstairs, opened the door and found myself face-to-face with man dressed from head to toe in brown polyester. He was holding a very large, very well-wrapped cardboard box.

“Package for Mr. Fat Sal.”

I signed for the package, took it from the UPS guy and looked at the mailing label. It was postmarked, “Copenhagen, Denmark.”

“Copenhagen?!” I thought to myself. “Copenhagen? Copenh...HEY!!! Isn’t it almost the month of...!!!”

I spun ‘round on my heel, ran into the house, tossed the package on the kitchen island and grabbed the nearest knife.

I sliced through the packing tape, peeled open the boxtop and parted the bubble wrap.

There they were! Just as I had hoped. Two 0.5 liter bottles of Paulaner Oktoberfest Beer and a note that said the following:
”INSERTING INTO MOUTH MAY CAUSE INJURY OR DEATH.”

Thank you, Anders...on what is happily becoming an annual event. You’re the best Viking friend a guy could ever have.

And Happy Oktoberfest to all.

11 Comments:

At 10:46 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am really happy to see that you've picked up a new hobby to keep you occupied (or is that preoccupied?).

So are you thinking the coconut is female or a pirate?

And maybe you should change next month's SW post? Or maybe not.

 
At 11:23 PM, Blogger Sal DeTraglia said...

Beep:

Did you say PIRATE?!!!

Sal

 
At 1:01 AM, Blogger Brenda said...

ARrrrgh! That I did, matey!

 
At 2:22 AM, Blogger Trac said...

I wonder if you do requests?
Like an Elvis coconut perhaps!?

For he is The King...
x

 
At 9:55 AM, Blogger Sal DeTraglia said...

Trac:

That's a great idea. Gimme a week or so to pull it together. Embarrssed as I am to say it, I don't have many sequined jumpsuits laying around the house. This will take a bit of creativity.

But you have my committment. The coconut King will enter the building soon.

Sal

 
At 6:14 PM, Blogger Trac said...

Brilliant! :O)

Not only do I have your commitment but I feel honoured that you trusted me enough to finally confess that you are rather lacking in the sequined jumpsuit department!

Admitting it to yourself is the first step to your recovery Sal!

May the King be with you!

 
At 8:05 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I wish it were Oktoberfest...
Actually it is October Fast...
Feeeed meeeeee!!!

 
At 8:23 PM, Blogger CanadianSwiss said...

Wait a minute, I though Oktoberfest was in Germany! Uhhm. If you do the the earrings, Sal, don't forget the eye patch.

I'm confused though. What is a mix of sequined jumpsuits and pirate gonna look like?!!? OMG. Ok, I don't know a psychologist, but I do know a vet. Or have you just been drikning too much coconut liquor lately?? ;-)

 
At 9:38 PM, Blogger Sal DeTraglia said...

Trac: You're right. I must take control of my life. And I'm going to start by growing sideburns the size of pork chops. In honor of the King.

Cream: Oh, those Ramadan blues. I feel for you, my friend. No food during daylight hours, I think I could handle. But no wine for a MONTH?! Your discipline is greatr than mine.

C.Swiss: Oktoberfest is a state of mind. A way of being. A promise of a better day. It knows no geographic boundaries...thanks, in part, to companies like UPS. BTW...did you say "pirate?"

 
At 9:49 PM, Blogger ramblingwoman said...

Hang on....isn't it still September?


(just followed Trac over here!)

 
At 10:00 PM, Blogger Sal DeTraglia said...

Hey! Now we have both a Wandering Woman AND a Rambling Woman in the VTB Chat Lounge. How cool is that.

BTW...any friend of Trac's is a friend of ours.

As for the September/October issue...haven't you heard of rounding up?

 

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